When a loved one passes away and you find yourself taking responsibility for the post-death arrangements, it's important that you respect any wishes that the person has left. Whether he or she has provided you with a note detailing some wishes or shared these wishes verbally before passing away, honoring them is a way to honor your loved one's life. You may not agree with some of the wishes, but this doesn't mean that you should alter them to suit your tastes. Here are some wishes that you should honor, even if you don't agree with them.
The Wish To Be Cremated
Many people favor the idea of cremation, but this doesn't mean every family member will necessarily be on board with the idea. You may think that a traditional burial is a better idea than being cremated, but if your loved one has asked for cremation, it's important to respect this wish. Work with the director of your local funeral home to arrange for this service. While you have the option of being present when the body is cremated, you don't necessarily have to attend if you're in opposition — but it is proper to go through with your loved one's wishes.
The Desire To Have No Service
For many people, a traditional funeral service is a way to celebrate the life of the person who has passed away and offer support to his or her family members. However, other people would rather not have a funeral service held in their memory for any number of reasons. If your loved one has requested that no service be held, it's important to respect this wish. When you put together the obituary, simply include a line such as, "No service will be held at the request of," and then list your loved one's name.
The Wish To Have Money Donated To A Charity
Some people love the idea of having people contribute flowers to their funeral service, while others prefer an alternative approach. In some cases, you may encounter a request from a loved one to have any money that might have been spent on flowers or other gifts donated to a local charity. This may go against your wishes — for example, you may favor the tradition and visual appeal of flowers. However, you should always respect this wish and publicize the charity in question in the obituary so that people can make a donation if they wish.